Tropes! Tropes! They're Everywhere!
by Violet Horizon
Summary: Title says all, the DGM charecters are being identified by certain aspects of their personalities, actions and looks that expresses alot out of them. However, there's some aspects that annoy them so much that they would demand a restraining order.
1. Evil Uncle

**A/N:** So a few days ago in creative writing class, my teacher told us to go on this website to research tropes. Tropes are figurative or metaphorical use of a word or expression like Comic Relief, Gender Bender, Filler, Bishonen, Tall Dark and Handsome, Birds of a Feather, etc. There's like tons and tons out there and so I was looking at D Gray Man which was awesome, there were so many. (I don't think I'm allowed to tell you the site, but just looks up 'tropes' and you'll find it in a snap.) We were looking up tropes coz it was gonna help us with our last assignment for the year, and I agree, tropes are really good devices for charecter and plot development. And so I had the idea of writing a fic about describing specific tropes for each chap that fits the charecters.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own DGM nor do I own the tropes that associate with the charecters and the anime/manga itself.

**Warning:** Some OOCness in this chap~

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><p><em>Trope 1, <em>_Evil Uncle: An uncle who's envious of his brother and or nephew and plots revenge somehow. (Yeah, that's easy to know, but I'll be giving the definition of each trope in every chapter so there's no confusion__.)_

_x~x~x~x~x_

Allen was brushing his teeth, minding his own business as he stared tiredly at his reflection. It was early in the morning and Allen wasn't in the mood for the work that Link had thrown at him. In speaking of which, the Inspector was standing beside Allen, brushing his teeth as well. Link was wide awake and ready, brushing his teeth faster and spitting out the paste at the speed of a bullet. He wiped his mouth and turned to Allen who was busy gurgling a mouthful of water and paste.

"Walker, I advise you to hurry up a bit."

"Hold on." Allen gurgled gutturally before spitting the water and paste into the sink. When Allen looked up, he saw the familiar smiling shadow of the Fourteenth staring at him from the reflection. Allen ignored the Noah's presence, but his chilling voice echoed intimidating in his mind.

_**How's my little nephew doing today?**_

_Did you seriously just called me your nephew? _Allen raised an eyebrow, glaring at the smiling shadow.

_**Of course, I am Mana's brother after all. **_

_And that makes you my adoptive uncle, but that still doesn't change the fact that I don't like you. _

_**I think we should have some bonding time then. **_

_How the hell can we have bonding time? _

_**We can go fishing. **_

_Fishing? _

_**Yeah, why not? **_

"Walker, what're you doing?" Link's voice almost made Allen jump in alarm. The exorcist composed himself and laughed half-heartedly.

"I was just thinking on what Jerry's cooking for breakfast." Allen abruptly lied, rubbing the back of his neck and nodded.

"Come on." Link urged and the two left the bathroom, walking down one of the long corridors. Link was explaining to Allen what kind of paperwork he had to do, but the boy was barely paying any attention.

_You idiot, are you trying to embarrass me? _Allen gritted his teeth in irritation.

_**Well I am your uncle. **_

_An evil uncle, I'll give you that. . . _

_**Just how am I evil? **_

Allen slapped his forehead rather hard and Link turned to him questionably, keeping a subtle frown, narrowing his eyes.

"Walker?"

_You've been trying to take over my body on several occasions! _Allen mentally yelled but physically stomped his foot on the ground, erupting a small thud.

_**That's not really evil though, it's more like . . .sharing. We're sharing the same body, Allen, as well as giving each other a helping hand. I helped you restore the Ark and now I'm slowly gaining control over your body in exchange. Now does that sound evil?**_

_Yes. I appreciated the help back on the Ark, but the fact that you implanted your memories inside me is disturbing and is turning me into a Noah! Hell, most of the Order thinks I'm a traitor now! _

_**But being a Noah is fun! You get all these super cool powers and you're practically immortal! You should be glad that—**_

_No. _

_**But—**_

_No. _

"Walker, what're you doing now?" Link was getting extremely impatient with the boy who was now making awkward facial gestures as he argued with Neah. Allen soon realized his position and cleared his throat sheepishly.

"Oh, uh. . . I'm just thinking about food again." Allen assured with another faint laugh.

"Well we are going to the cafeteria now, Walker. I suggest you to pay attention before I suspect something. Your behavior has been rather strange as of late. . ." Link muttered and Allen bit down on his lower lip nervously.

_See what I'm talking about! _

_**I only see a guy with dots on his face. **_

Allen huffed agitatedly and marched on ahead to the cafeteria with Link following tow. The Inspector was losing his tolerance and Allen was so close of bashing his head at the nearest wall, wondering if that could get Neah out of his head.

_Why couldn't you plant your memories in someone else? _Allen pouted, walking over to order breakfast.

"I'll just have a cheese omelet and some sausages." Allen exclaimed gloomily to Jerry.

"That's it?" Jerry gasped in disbelief, plucking a finger in his ear to check his hearing.

"Yeah, I'm not that hungry, plus I have a lot of paperwork to do." Allen answered. _And the fact that I have a Noah in my head bugging the hell out of me! _

_**Don't act like I can't hear you. Respect your uncle! **_

_Oh I'll respect you alright. . . _Allen's eye twitched, soon receiving his food and rushing over to the table where his fellow exorcists were sitting at. Allen angrily slammed his tray of food on the table, startling everyone as he yelled at the top of his lungs, striking a finger at a random direction.

"I'LL RESPECT YOU WHEN YOU GET YOUR ASS OUT OF MY MIND AND FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO SCREW WITH!"

Allen's voice boomed vociferously through out the cafeteria, bouncing off the walls in constant echoes. Then suddenly, there was complete and utter silence as everyone turned to Allen in awe. Even Kanda stopped eating his precious soba to stare at the moyashi. Lavi-who was nearest to the white-haired exorcist-figured that Allen's dark side has finally awakened and was the only one to move as he cautiously scooted to the farthest end of the table. Allen stood frozen in the center, feeling a lost of breath as he paled a deathly white, realizing what he has done.

_**So. . . **_Neah broke the silence—well at least in Allen's mind, everyone was just too stunned to speak. _**H****ow about that fishing trip? **_

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><p><strong>AN:** I don't think Neah is entirely evil, but it was listed as a DGM trope so whatever. The evil uncle trope is just for fun, it doesn't have to be 100 percent literal. Anyways, each chap will be a diffrent trope and if there's one that you wish for me to write about, be my guest. It's really easy to search for DGM tropes, just type it up and you'll pretty much find the site. There's. So. Many. Tropes. O.O So I'm gonna have fun writing this fic~ Lots of the charecters will be included, but it's mostly gonna be the exorcists. Suggestions for whatever trope you want me to write for a chap are welcome, thanks for reading ^-^

Oh by the way, I got the 'Respet your uncle' line from the movie Ponyo (love that movie~) but it's originally 'Respect your father.' since Ponyo's dad constantly says it. Gosh Neah was sooooo OOC in this. . . I'll try to keep the OOCness to a minimum, there shouldn't be much and I'll give out warnings if there's any as well as pairings coz pairings are gonna show up later on. There's also gonna be a particular charecter bashing, can you guess who it is? Actually I might reveal it next chap (with a particular trope that made me go 'lol' and deserves to be revealed coz it fits this charecter so much!) but I'll see what you guys think about this chap.


	2. The Scrappy

**A/N:** Ello again~ I'm gonna reveal the charecter that I'm gonna be bashing for this chap, and that is. . -drum roll- Chaoji! I'm sorry, but this guy is more annoying than creepy-moustache-Hitler guy. He just irks me so much, especially the way he treats Allen. I'm sorry for any Chaoji lovers out there, but this guy is so useless, he's only there coz he has Innocence and that's really it. Anyways, here's the chapter, enjoy.

**Warning:** Allen's a bit OOC here and there's Chaoji bashing~

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><p><em>Trope 2,<em> _The Scrappy: The complete opposite of any awesome trope title for a charecter, they're charecter's usually bashed by the fans 'cause they're so useless and try to get in the way of other-more important-charecters but end up messing up. This trope is named after Scrappy Doo from Scooby Doo._

_x~x~x~x~x_

Chaoji joyously skipped through the cafeteria, humming to himself as he carried his tray of food. He spotted his fellow exorcists sitting at a table and decided to join them. However when he approached, the exorcists were scowling at him, but the pudgy one was oblivious.

"Good morning, everyone!" Chaoji settled his tray on the table and the death glares that he was receiving were darkening as an ominous aura hovered over the table.

"What are you doing?" Allen spoke; his voice was unusually cold as he kept his distance from the jolly exorcist.

"Sitting here with you guys, of course!" When Chaoji's butt made contact with the bench, it nearly collapsed under its own weight.

"This is the Bishonen table." Allen continued, flipping a strand of hair out of his face to show off his mystic gray eyes. "As I recall, you're not a Bishonen, not even coming close."

"Eh?" Chaoji blinked his mouth dropping. "B—but I'm an exorcist! We're partners! Why are you excluding me! Is it my fatty cuteness that alludes you?"

Lavi—who was listening at the Badass Bookworm table—came over to join in the conversation. "Oh, it looks like Chaoji-chan doesn't understand. Tell him, Yu—"

"No." Kanda muttered as he ate his soba, wanting to be alone despite being at the same table as Allen. Why was he there again? Oh, right, fanservice.

"Okay, I'll explain." Lavi draped an arm around Chaoji's shoulders. "You see, Chaoji-chan, besides the fact that you aren't both beautiful and manly like us, you're also a pain in the ass, causing our tolerance towards you to dwindle down in negatives each time you show your face."

"Th—that's ridiculous! When have I ever been a pain to you all! You're my friends!" Chaoji pulled away from Lavi, hesitatedly taking few steps back, staring at the exorcists in disbelief with over the top tears in his eyes.

"Well lets look back at the ark, shall we." Allen muttered, nibbling on a burger with Timcanpy eating the other end of it. "You accused me of being evil."

"That's because you were helping a Noah!" Chaoji cried dramatically as tears were flying out of his eyes, sparking by the lighting above them. Kanda felt like puking by the cheesiness.

"Do we seriously have to go through this again?" Allen sighed. "Look, the mangaka made me like a Messiah or something so of course I would have to save _everyone_ no matter who they are."

"You're mad." Chaoji gasped in a harsh whisper, his eyes widening unnecessarily.

"I'm not mad; I'm just different from you." Allen remarked calmly, finishing up his burger.

"Le—Lenalee!" Chaoji shot out of his seat and rushed to the 'Real Women Never Wear Dresses' table.

"Hm, Chaoji?" Lenalee turned to the pudgy exorcist who was flailing his arms crazily in the air.

"Lenalee—" Choaji stopped in front of the girl, trying to catch his breath as he spoke even though he just ran at least a few feet. "Lenalee. . . Kanda, Allen and Lavi don't like me! They think I'm a pain in the ass! How could they do that to their bestest friend!"

"Oh, no." Lenalee got off her chair and hugged the pudgy one in all her sisterly/friendly comfort. "They probably didn't mean it, I'll go talk to them." Lenalee assured with a small smile that made the cheesiness of Chaoji's smile go up a new level as he smiled back with admiration in his eyes.

Lenalee went up to the Bishonen table to confront Kanda and Allen—Lavi went back to his table, engage in a conversation with the Badass Gramps.

"Oh, Allen~" Lenalee glided over to sit next to her friend-slash-little-brother-slash-possible-love-intrest-slash-anything-else-that-would-define-their-relationship-till-said-mangaka-confirms-it.

"Hey, Lenalee!" Allen called out adorably, setting his Cute Shotaro Boy status to the maximum, making Kanda 'che.' His Jerkassness couldn't get any better as he ignored whatever the hell the Moyashi and the Kick Chick were discussing.

"I heard that you weren't being nice to Chaoji." Lenalee frowned slightly. Allen finished the rest of his rather quickly before speaking:

"Well he hasn't been nice to us either, he yelled at me and that hurt a lot. . ." Allen sniffed, letting out the Sexy Cry as one single tear dripped out of the boy's left eye and trailed steadily down his cheek.

"I'm sorry about that. What about you, Kanda?" Lenalee looked over at the Long-Haired Pretty Boy. Kanda was too busy eating his soba to give a damn but he nevertheless looked blankly at the Plucky Girl. . . might as well just answer so they could leave him alone.

"He's annoying." Kanda remarked coldly.

"Why?" Lenalee's frown deepened but it didn't faze the Tall, Dark and Snarky exorcist.

"'Cause he complains more times than Moyashi."

"That's Mr. Badass Adorable!" Allen yelled, slamming his fist on the table.

"More like Mr. Circus Brat." Kanda rolled his eyes and Allen was about to lung at him but Lenalee kept him still by giving him a dango from out of nowhere to keep him distracted.

"Kanda, Allen . . . Chaoji is a really nice guy if you give him the chance." Lenalee exclaimed quietly.

"No." Both said in unison rather abruptly as they casted death glares on said exorcist who was crying out dramatic tears nearby. His so called 'Super Strength' was seriously just an illusion since he was pretty much making a full of himself. Screw his Innocence; it's too boring and unoriginal.

"I can't believe you too!" Lenalee exclaimed, just loud enough for half of the cafeteria to hear and they all looked curiously to the Bishonen table. Lenalee shot up from the table, gave both exorcists bonks on the head before running off angrily. She grabbed Chaoji's arm and the two rushed out of the cafeteria to avoid anymore disturbances.

Allen scowled at Kanda. "Great! You made her angry, Kanda!"

"Che."

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><p><strong>AN:** Great, I wanna re-write chap 1 but I always mess up when I'm editing a chapter so nevermind. . .anyways, hopefully this chap's a bit better coz I know the last one was kind of 'bleh' so that's why I updated another chap a bit early. So yeah, I'm probaly not gonna bash any other charecters coz they're all just awesome, I even like the Earl so I won't bash on him, so. . .yeah. I mentioned alot of tropes here (yes, I'll be discussing about some of them sooner or later.) but I dunno if Sexy Cry is really a trope, it's when a charecter lets out a single tear to bring in some drama so. . .yeah. . .I should be heading to bed now ^^;


	3. Put on a Bus

_3rd Trope, Put on a Bus_:_ When a charecter leaves the series, they're put on the bus, not to return for a long while. They usually return safe and sound, but can sometimes be put on the bus again. _

_x~x~x~x~x_

Kanda was sitting on a bench, waiting for the bus to arrive. A scowl was plastered on his face as he gripped on the hilt of Mugen, passing the time by scowling at the lucky bastards who crossed his path. Soon the bus arrived—a big yellow one that looked suspiciously like a school bus. Kanda sighed in annoyance as he stepped into the vehicle, taking a seat at the very back.

"Oh, Kanda! Thank goodness you're here!"

Kanda looked over the seat next to him and saw Crowley with a joyful grin on his face.

"I'm so glad I'm not alone anymore! I've been on this bus for so long, I was afraid that I wouldn't see my friends again! And now you're here and now I'm happy!"

"Che." Kanda turned away and focused his attention at the window. The bus was driving away from the Order and going forward to an unknown destination. Crowley slid over to sit next to the silent exorcist, keeping a large smile on his face.

"What the hell are you doing?" Kanda muttered, still focused on the endless landscaping outside. It was just rolling hills and fields filled with flowers, there better not be any lotuses in there or Kanda will have a angsty flashback, he was too manly to angst.

"Oh, it's just. . . we never had a conversation so while we're here, we should get to know each other a bit better." Crowley exclaimed shyly.

Kanda pressed his face against the window pane, wondering how long he's gonna be stuck on this bus trip. He didn't have anything to occupy with himself so he really didn't have a choice. . .

"Fine, what do you want to talk about?" Kanda's eye twitch, feeling a loss of dignity. The stupid Moyashi was probably taking all popularity right now 'cause he's the main freaking protagonist.

Meanwhile in a distant place, Allen sneezed right after he destroyed dozens of Level 3 Akuma _alone. _He looked around the midst of the battlefield in wonder. . . .till he decided to do a little victory dance for being awesome as well as being the main charecter and all.

Kanda swore that when he gets off this bus, he'll make sure that his next appearance would be worthy and important, making sure that the Moyashi doesn't get in his way.

"Um, Kanda. . ."

"What?"

"What's your favorite color?"

Kanda blinked, trying to register that awkward question in his head before turning to the Actually Not A Vampire exorcist.

"Why do you want to know that?" Kanda inquired gloomily.

"Well, that's the first question that I had in mind." Crowley shrugged, knowing that this was awkward as well.

"I dunno. . ." Kanda turned back to the window. "Blue I guess."

"Oh, I like blue too!" Crowley gasped in excitement but then pursed his lips in wonder. "But I don't think it's my favorite color. . .wait do I even have a favorite? What was Eliade's favorite color? Maybe her favorite color was my favorite as well."

Kanda felt like bashing his head on the window, but he composed himself and started to think about soba noodles despite that he wasn't hungry.

"So. . . have you been on the bus before, Kanda?" Crowely now asked, curiosity lacing his quiet voice.

"Yes. . ." Kanda gritted his teeth, now thinking about that Moyashi. If only he could've dragged that Circus Brat into the bus and force him to stay there forever.

"I'm sorry about that. But soon we'll be off, I'm sure! You just have to look on the bright side to lighten your mood!"

Kanda rested his head on his palm, leaning his elbow against the window. "I can't really think of a bright side to this unless that Moyashi drops dead."

"How can you say that?" Crowley gasped, not believing what he was hearing. "Allen has helped all of us, you know!"

"Che." Was Kanda's blunt response, not in the mood to continue with this stupid conversation.

Crowley sighed in defeat and moved back to his original seat, deciding to take a little nap. But it wasn't long till Crowley started to snore pretty heavily. However, that wasn't the worst part. . . the driver on the bus turned out to be the Earl and he started to _sing. Sing? _Yup, it was definitly It's The End of the World as We Know It

"The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, round and round. The wheels on the bus go round and round, all straight towards Hell!"

Kanda drew out Mugen, ready to attack the Earl but seat belts sprung out from under the seats and tied themselves tightly around Kanda and Crowley.

"The wipers on the bus go swish, swish, swish; swish, swish, swish; swish, swish, swish. The wipers on the bush go swish, swish, swish, all straight towards Hell!" The Earl continued to sing, laughing at the end of each line. Kanda struggled to break the hold on him, but more seatbelts kept coming out of nowhere and tightened his grip.

"The horn on the bus goes beep, beep, beep; beep, beep, beep; beep, beep, beep. The horn on the bus goes beep, beep, beep, all straight towards Hell!" The Earl squeezed the horn several times and a dissonant, squeaky noice erupted throughout the bus.

"The doors on the bus lock up tight, lock up tight, lock up tight. The doors on the bus lock up tight, till we arrive at Hell!"

A lock in the shape of a skull appeared on the door and Kanda felt like he was getting a Mind Rape as the singing continued.

"Get me out of here!" Kanda yelled, but a seatbelt wrapped itself around Kanda's mouth.

"Everyone on the bus screams, screams, screams; screams, screams, screams; screams, screams, screams. Everyone on the bus screams, screams, screams, but I just smile~"

The singing went on and on till it felt like it would never end. The Earl was laughing his ass off as he was driving crazily down whatever corrupted dimension they were all in now. Outside it was pitch black, just plain black. Kanda wondered if they really were in Hell.

But then suddenly, a light approached them and the bus stopped at a bus stop. Kanda and Crowley were freed from the clutches of the seat belts and both rushed out of the bus as the doors opened.

Standing at the bus stop was Allen who was waiting for his comrades to return. He waved to them with his Badass Adorable smile.

"Hey, guys, welcome ba—" Allen was cut off when Kanda ruthlessly grabbed the boy's collar and pulled him up to his face, threatening him with a Death Glare.

"You white haired bastard, how would you feel if you were trapped in a bus for so damn long that you have no idea whether you'll be back or not?" Kanda hissed darkly.

"I—I don't know." Allen shivered.

"WELL FIND OUT YOURSELF! YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TAKE ALL THE FREAKING CREDIT ALL THE GODDAMN TIME!" And with brutal force, Kanda violently threw a defenseless and baffled Allen straight into the bus, slamming him into one of the seats. Just as Allen rose, the bus's doors closed shut and drove away.

Kanda chuckled to himself and walked away with a haughty grin. Crowley safely walked into the opposite direction.

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><p>AN: Sorry if this chap wasn't that all exciting, couldn't think of many ideas for this trope really but I wanted to write about it anyways since Kanda seems to disappear alot, the same with Crowley. And have the two ever had a conversation together?


	4. Pet the Dog

Warning: I can't really say if the Earl is OOC in this one, I can imagine him doing this just fine, unless I'm proven wrong. . .

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><p><em>Trope 4, Pet the Dog: This associates with charecters who seem to always do bad things, but actually have a heart when they do something good, usually throwing everyone off. <em>

x~x~x~x~x~x

"Allen, Kanda, Lavi, I have a job for you three." Komui exclaimed to the exorcists who were sitting at the couch across from his messy desk.

"Why the hell am I always with these guys?" Kanda muttered, glaring at the moyashi and usagi.

"'Cause of fanservice." Komui answered with a broad smile that made the samurai's eye twitch in disgust. "Anyways! The Millienium Earl has been spotted in some town somewhere here." Komui drew out a stick and aimed at some random city in England on the map. "Surprisingly there's no sign of Akuma, so check to see what the Earl's up too."

"Alright, let's go!" Lavi rushed out of the room excitedly, followed by Allen and Kanda who was cursing under his breath.

x~x~x~x~x

"So if there's no sign of Akuma . ." Allen started as he and his comrades were walking down on the streets of town. "What could the Earl be doing?"

"How the hell should I know?" Kanda asked.

"Maybe he's planning something evil!" Lavi exclaimed.

"No shit, Sherlock." Kanda rolled his eyes.

"Or maybe he's. . . " Allen stopped dead and Lavi almost bumped into him. "Buying flowers."

"What!" Lavi looked at Allen's direction and saw the Earl, creator of Akuma and mastermind of evilness, buying flowers from a sweet little girl. Lavi's and Allen's jaws dropped, even Kanda was staring in horror, wondering if Jerry purposely put drugs in his soba or something.

"Thank you, little girl." The Earl patted the girl's head and skipped off with a bouquet of colorful roses.

"Why did he bought flowers? That's just. . . wrong." Lavi whispered, his eye widened in disbelief.

"I don't know, lets follow." Allen suggested and the exorcists followed the Earl into a shop.

"Good afternoon!" The Earl cheered, prancing right into the store and being greeted by the workers like he was an average costumer.

The exorcists snuck in and hid behind one of the aisles that were lined up in several rows. The Earl browsed through the aisles curiously while the exorcists had to scoot away several times so they weren't spotted.

"Oh, this is lovely!" The Earl picked out a large stuffed penguin with a bow wrapped around it's nonexistent neck. "How much is this?" The Earl scurried over to the clerk, plopping the gigantic stuff animal on the glass counter.

"Ten Euros." The clerk announced and The Earl rummaged through his pocket, brought out a Relo-looking wallet and drew out the money.

"I'll take it!" The Earl slammed the money on the counter and then he gasped. "Oh, I forgot to get a card! I'll be right back!"

Allen, who was in the card aisle busy looking at a few cards, suddenly ducked on the floor and got his legs dragged off by Lavi who pulled him to the other side of the aisle just as the Earl entered the section.

"You need to be careful, Allen." Lavi murmured urgently. "Who knows what would happen if the Earl saw us. You listening, Yu—" Lavi turned to Kanda and his jaw dropped when he found the samurai taking a look at a bottle of lotus perfume with intrest.

"Uh, Yu?"

Kanda noticed Lavi looking at him and quickly place the perfume back on the shelf before the bunny could utter a word.

"I was just looking. . ." Kanda muttered, avoiding the redhead's gaze.

Lavi smirked evily and passed on this newfound information to Allen who was keeping watch on the Earl. Allen held in his laughter but even then, Kanda wanted to slice him up.

"Will you two shut up? The Earl is leaving!" Kanda announced, aiming a finger at the Earl who has now exited the store.

"Eh!" Lavi and Allen cried in unsion and they all ran out of the store in a flash. They soon spotted the Earl walking into a bakery and they hurried inside.

"Good afternoon!" The Earl greeted as he stepped into the little bakery. "I ordered a large red velvet cake with the butterfly shaped dark chocolate decorated around it a while ago! Is it ready?"

When the trio entered, droll started to drip out of Lavi's mouth as he gazed at allof the deserts that were isecured in glass cases. Lavi mindlessly started to run for them but Kanda tugged on the exorcist's hair.

"Oi, we can't be seen, stupid."

"Then why is Allen grabbing all the muffins?" Lavi pointed to a startled Allen who was secretly trying to grab as many blue berry muffins as he could in his arms. Allen laughed nervously and gently put them back in the case when he got caught.

Kanda gritted his teeth and was about to yell at the moyashi till the Earl spotted Allen and the exorcists knew that hell broke loose.

"Oh, hello Allen!" The Earl greeted with his everlasting smile. "Do you want a muffin?"

"Uh. . ."

"I'll give you those muffins, my treat!" The Earl gathered up at least a dozen muffins and bought them all along with the massive cake he ordered. He handed a paper bag to Allen and patted his head.

"I'm so happy you came, is anyone else with you?" The Earl asked and that was when Lavi and Kanda knew to get the hell out of there. Lavi reached for the door while Kanda pushed the redhead through as they tried to barge the door open, but the two were oblivious to know that they had to _pull_ instead of push said door.

"Lavi! Kanda! You two are here, too!" The Earl spotted the exorcists and skipped over to them. "This is great, you two can help me carry all this stuff!" The Earl gave the bouquet of flowers to Allen, the cake to Lavi and the giant stuffed penguin to Kanda.

"Alright, lets go!" The Earl led the three back outside. "If you're wondering what's the occasion, it's Tyki's birthday! So I'm getting him all this stuff! Do you giuys want to come to the party?"

"No." The three said in unsion.

"Too late, we're all going!" The Earl laughed and before they could blink, they appeared in front of a rounded table where all the Noahs were sitting-looking at the newcomers with Slasher Smiles. Allen, Lavi and even Kanda, paled.

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><p>AN: And this chap will lead into a little sequel of this coz who doesn't want a chap about Tyki's b-day? When is it by the way? It never said on wiki so who knows~ Anyways the Earl is in his fat jolly form, not in his human form if you're wondering.


	5. Evil Is One Big Happy Family

Warning: Tyki's a bit OOC but it's his birthday in this chap so he's forgiven and there's tiny hints of Tyki x Allen x Road (they're really tiny so if you're not a fan of the pairings don't be alarmed, all sorts of pairings will be popping up in this fic just so you know.)

* * *

><p><em>Trop 5, Evil Is One Big Happy Family: While the bad guys are mean to the good guys, but they're nice to each other and treat each other like one big happy family.<em>

x~x~x~x~x

Allen, Lavi and Kanda were entirely frozen as they stared baffled at the Noahs who were sitting around a table in the middle of eating dinner. There was silence till Road suddenly glomped Allen and sent him flying to the floor. Lavi raised an eyebrow while Kanda just 'che.' but realized he was still holding the penguin plushie. Kanda threw the plushie on the ground and proceeded to stomp on it till the Earl jumped on the table excitedly.

"We have honorable guests today! Our beloved exorcist are here to celebrate Tyki's birthday! Come, come, sit with us." The Earl grabbed the exorcists to sit at the table and literally strapped robes around them so they wouldn't escape. Road was attached to Allen and had the robe wrapped securely around herself and the white haired exorcist who was officially weirded out.

Kanda was unfortunately sitting in between Skin (who's somehow alive.) and the twins while Lavi was sitting in between Lulubell and the Earl. All that was missing was Tyki who should be arriving—

"Alright, who replaced my favorite top hat with the Earl's birthday hat?" Tyki stormed into the room wearing an oversized top hat with a birthday cake flashing the words 'happy birthday' in neon colors.

"Happy birthday!" All the Noahs cheered and gave Tyki a group hug (except for Road who was currently attached to Allen and has the excuse of not being able to get out of the ropes due to being lovestuck. . .if that made sense)

"Oh, thank you." Tyki hugged back but was soon struggling to breath since the Noahs—especially the Earl—were squeezing him to death.

Kanda twisted his body around to reach for Mugen while Lavi was trying to scoot his chair away but it toppled over backwards. Allen on the other hand was now being taken over by Neah which slightly startled Road but hugged him again nevertheless.

"So how old are you today, Tyki, 50?" Neah asked with a devilish smirk.

"Watch it, Ne-ah!" Tyki's eyes almost popped out of their sockets and all the Noahs gasped as they saw Neah. The Earl swooned, falling with a squishy plop and Relo hysterically screamed to try and wake him up, which obviously failed.

"Wait, I'm confused." Skin raised his hand timidly. "If he's a Noah—" points to Neah "and the exorcists are here." Points to a pissed off Kanda and Lavi who was struggling to get off the ground. "And I'm here." Points to himself. "Then we're all living in a universe where Noahs and exorcists are living in perfect harmony!" Skin rushed over to Kanda and gave him a bear hug. Kanda squirmed around like a worm to break the hold but Skin was literally crushing him.

"Uh. . . not quite." Tyki raised an eyebrow at Skin's action and sat down at the table and turned to Neah. "So how is it that we look so much alike?

"That question is up with why-the-hell-does-the-Earl's-human-form-look-like-Mana. This means that I have no damn clue and Hoshino just wants to screw with us." Neah answered and then transitioned back to Allen.

"What do you mean the Earl looks like Mana!" Allen cried and thus transitions back to Neah.

"I don't know!"

"You should know."

"How should I know?"

"'Cause you're the Evil Uncle therefore you know everything!"

"Oh now you accept me as your uncle."

"Shut up and give me some answers!"

"Ask Road, apparently she knows everything around here."

Allen turned to Road who was still attached to him and busy licking a lollipop to really notice anything.

"What?" Road blinked and noticed that all eyes were on her now. Well, except for the Earl who was still in la-la land ridding a unicorn over a rainbow made of sugar.

"Hi, everyone!" Sheril popped out of nowhere with a chunk load of presents in his arms. "Where's my brother so I can give him a big birthday hug!" Sheril dumped the presents on the table and saw Tyki. Before Sheril could hug him, the man noticed his adoptive daughter hugging Allen. He gasped dramatically and knocked Allen's chair backwards while he flung Road into his arms.

"I saved you, Road!" Sheril exclaimed proudly and then glared down at Allen who had swirls in his eyes and swore he saw Timcanpy flying around his head.

"Daddy, don't be mean to Allen." Road pouted but Sheril was more focused on the deserts that some Akuma servants were bringing out.

"Look at all the desserts, Road!" Sheril was now offically distracted.

"Yay, sweets!" Road cheered and jumped in to grab a plate of cookies but Skin was faster as he was already nibbling on some pie.

"Wait a minute!" Tyki called out as he shot out from his chair. "We need to sing happy birthday to me first!"

Road simply stuck her tongue at her adoptive uncle and dug into the desserts along with the rest of the Noahs. Then Jasdero and Devit started to throw the desserts at one another and accidently threw a large banana cream pie at the birthday boy's face. The pie slid off of Tyki's face, leaving remnants of cream on the Noah's cheeks and nose.

Tyki glared over at the twins and grabbed hold a tray of brownies and stuffed the treats in both twins' mouths.

"I'd like us to sing happy birthday first, thank you!" Tyki exclaimed, his usual calmness has now flown away and sent all the Noahs into alert. Lulubell got the cake that the Earl bought and settled it in the center of the table.

Tyki sat back down in front of the cake and patiently waited for Lulubell to light up all the candles. When she was done, all the lights in the room turned off and the lighting of the candles illuminated the room rather eerily.

"Happy birthday—"

"Earl! We don't need your creepy voice to ruin this one happy moment of my life besides killing and stalking my boy, Allen!" Tyki exclaimed, glaring at the Earl who felt his heart skip a beat at the rude comment . . . wait, does he even have a heart?

"I'll sing!" Road proclaimed. "All together, everyone! Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to—"

Tyki blew out all the candles before Road could finish.

"How old are you know!" Road sung loudly and Tyki stuffed a piece of brownie in her mouth as well.

"I say he's 50, I can see some gray hair. . . no offense, Allen." Neah piped up and avoided a brownie that was thrown at him. The brownie pierced through his chair like a knife.

"Anyways. . ." Tyki cleared his throat and gained his calmness back. "where are my presents?"

"Right here!" The twins brought out all the presents in a stack and dumped them on Tyki's lap. The Earl also handed Tyki the bouquet of roses and stuffed penguin.

"Wait . . . why a stuffed penguin?" Tyki inquired curiously.

"'Cause it's cute!"

"Hmmm, well I do like cute things." Tyki gestured over to Allen who's eye was twitching in disgust. Why does he get the feeling that everyone likes him? Even his enemies? Why couldn't he just be paired with just one person?

Tyki opened all his presents: Road gave him a voodoo doll of Allen (in which Allen was scarred for life.) Skin gave him a box of chocolates, Lulubell gave him some fancy hair gel, the twins gave him a water gun and gag toys, Sheirl gave him a pretty pink bow tie and a bunch load of other stuff that he would only use once. . .with the exception of the Allen voodoo doll, he was sure to make precious use of that.

After the party, the exorcists were able to return back to the Order safe and sound. Kanda took a long hot shower, Allen hid in a dark corner for a bit and Lavi went to read a book since he was barely tortured in this chap.

Oh, but wait till next chap.

* * *

><p>AN: I feel like crap right now, I've had some sweets and wrote this chap, but nothing's doing it, heck, I'm even listening to depressing music right now. I'm probaly having summer fever right now, I only have 6 days of school left but I just want it to end already. . .but one thing's for sure, math needs to die. . .I want to take all the insturments that are used in math and throw them into a pit of fire and dance on the ashes. Anyways, thanks for reviewing the other chaps and hopefully you enjoyed this chap. . .sort of. . . maybe. . .well at least enjoyed it more than I did.


	6. Calling Your Attacks

_Trope 6, Call Out Your Attacks. . . well it's charecters yelling out their attacks and being extremly loud about it._

x~x~x~x~x

Allen, Lavi and Kanda were on a mission together and were sneaking up on a few Akuma that were heading straight towards a puppy farm. They had to do this quickly and silently so they wouldn't disturb the cute little puppies inside the farm. Puppies have really sensible ears and hearing them whine desperately for help from the noise even makes Kanda feel a bit guilty.

"Alright, let's do this." Allen jumped into a bush and moved it gradually towards the Akuma with Lavi and Kanda in tow. "On the count of three—"

"Why are we listening to you?" Kanda hissed. "We all attack individually."

"No, it'll be faster if we attack as a group." Allen retorted.

"You're an idiot."

"Your hair's too long. Cut it."

"Shut up."

"You look like a girl."

"You look like an old geezer."

"Guys, calm down." Lavi urged and turned back to the farm and saw one Akuma pick up a small litter of puppies that were sleeping peacefully in a box. "OMG! THEY GOT THE PUPPIES!" Lavi activated his Innocence and hurled at the Akuma. "HI BAAAAAAAAAAAAN!" Lavi bashed the Akuma on the head and somehow they all exploded in an extremely loud explosion.

"You idiot!" Allen and Kanda yelled in unison.

"I saved the puppies!" Lavi hugged the box filled with puppies but now they were whining hysterically in a dissonant chorus.

"Give me the box!" Allen snatched the box out of Lavi's hands and turned to the upset puppies. "Don't worry, everything's fine, please stop crying."

"Hey, at least I destroyed the Akuma!" Lavi exclaimed proudly but received a bonk on the head by Kanda.

"We were supposed to be _quiet_, stupid rabbit."

"But I always have to call out my attacks." Lavi pouted. "It's not my fault that the puppies are upset."

"Yes it is." Allen frowned. "And you should be ashamed."

"You call your attacks too, Sprout." Lavi countered.

"Yes, but they're more awesome sounding."

"Pfffft!" Lavi toppled backwards and was laughing his head off. "More awesome? C'mon Allen, your Innocence's name is _Crown Clown_ that's like, ridiculous. I on the other hand have a bad ass hammer!"

"You always yell big hammer little hammer and _that's_ ridiculous." Allen argued.

"It's cute." Lavi exclaimed. "And what about you and your clown fetish?"

"I was raised in the circus!"

"Oh, look at me—" Lavi grabbed a blanket from out of nowhere and tied it around his neck. He also took off his bandana and made his hair the same style as Allen's with his Innocence invoked. "I'm the main character and apparently I have the coolest attacks! CLOWN BELT!" Lavi took off his own belt and tossed it to the ground. "HOW WICKED WAS THAT!

Allen's mouth dropped at the mockery and decided to play along. He grabbed Lavi's bandana and wrapped it around his head and stole Lavi's hammer.

"Oh, look at me, I was once a main character and now I've been demoted!" Allen waved the hammer around. "BIG HAMMER, LITTLE HAMMER, EXTEND!" Allen tossed the hammer in the air but it fell back just a few feet away from him. Allen turned around and winked at Lavi. "STRIKE!"

"Hey, only I can pull off the strike move." Lavi's eye twitched slightly.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Sprout." Allen chuckled.

"It's All—Lavi!" Lavi took his hammer and placed it back in his pocket but then a light bulb lit up. "I'm not a sprout. . . I'M ALLEN WALKER AND I GOT A SWORD!" Lavi picked up a stick and struck it in the air. "AND I CAN'T USE IT ACCURATLY COZ I ACCIDENTLY AWAKENED TYKI'S NOAH AND CAUSED MAYHEM! BUT I AM STILL THE HERO!"

Allen stole back Lavi's hammer as well as his eye patch and strapped it over his eye. "I'M GONNA WHACK A MOLE!" Allen started to bash the hammer at random objects while yelling: "HI BAN! HI BAN! HI BAN! HI BAN!"

"SHUT UP!" Kanda yelled which got the two's attention. He held Mugen in his hand and had it aimed at them. "KAICHU ICHIGEN!"

"AHHHHHHHHHHH!" Allen and Lavi dashed off to avoid Kanda's attack. When the two were out of sight, Kanda picked up the litter of puppies and placed them back in the farm.

* * *

><p>AN: Yeah, this was a short chap, but I wanted to get through this quickly so I could get to the next trope which is Launcher of a Thousand Ships, and that should be very, very fun~


	7. Launcher of a Thousand Ships

**Warnings:** _Everyone_ x Allen, well, not exactly everyone but you'll see. plus hints of other pairings. And there's also OOCness because of this but there's a reason.

* * *

><p><em>Trope 6, Launcher of a Thousand Ships:<em> That one charecter that can be paried with everyone for no apparent reason except for the everlasting joy of fandoms 'cause pairing that certain charecter to one or two other charecters isn't nough.

~x~x~x~x~x~

Allen gawked at the peculiar looking product in his hand that he discovered in his bedroom. He didn't know whether or not this was a trick from Komui or just an early birthday and or Christmas present. The product in his hand had bold, silver lettering, acknowledging the name in an elegant format while within the vessel was a clear, purple liquid. What baffled Allen were the words that described this product, it was cologne.

It was called uke cologne to be exact.

Allen had no idea what uke was, but he did like cologne. Without a second thought, Allen sprayed the cologne on his wrist and sniffed it. He smelled like a mix of lavender and peppermint with a blend of something really, really sweet and delicious, probably the uke scent kicking in or something.

_**Hey, Allen. **_

_What is it?_ Allen asked the Noah in his head while spraying some more cologne on himself. It may be an odd smell for cologne but it smelled so go~od.

_**Can I take over your body for a bit? **_

_No._

_**Why not? **_

_Cause it's my body._

_**C'mon, please? **_

_What are you going to do with my body anyways?_

_**Well. . . I'd like to get to know you a bit better**_

_What do you mean by that?_ Allen raised an eyebrow and placed the cologne back on the nightstand. _You practically know everything about me since you've been in my head for who knows how long._

_**No, not everything. **_

_I seriously don't understand where you're going with this, uncle._

_**Hey, don't call me your uncle! We're not related, okay? Sure, Mana adopted you, but that's it! I'm not your uncle, you're not my nephew, incest is gross, now let me take over your body! **_

Allen paused. _What's incest?_

There was suddenly a knock at the door before Neah could answer. Allen opened the door and there appeared Link with a stack of papers. But just as Link caught Allen's big, hazy gray eyes, he dropped the huge stack of papers on the floor. In result, the papers scattered all over the place and created a little sea.

"Oh, W—Walker." Link's face flustered and forgot about all the papers on the floor.

"Good morning, Link, you dropped some paper." Allen smiled and bent down to pick up all the papers and handed them back to Link . . . who dropped the stack once more.

"Are you alright, Link?" Allen blinked and eyed the man weirdly who was just standing there with his face transitioning into a deeper shade of pink.

"I'm fine, Walker." Link gulped down heavily. "Um . . .there's no work for you to do today, so you can whatever you want."

"But how about Leverrier?"

"Who?"

"Your boss."

"Never heard of him." Link seemed to be in a daze that Allen didn't notice at all since he was now focused on his stomach which started to grumble. The exorcist waved 'bye' to the dazed Link and bounded off to the cafeteria.

"Hi, Jerry!" Allen waved to the chief who automatically squealed once the exorcist approached.

"Oh, hello, sweetie! What shall I get for you today?"

"Just the usual." Allen replied, knowing that he didn't have any paperwork to do really cheered him up.

"Coming right up, pumpkin!" Jerry turned around but then stopped and looked over his shoulder. "Oh, may I also interest you in my new homemade chocolate cake?"

"Of course!" Allen nodded eagerly and soon he was given his breakfast as well as a cake in the shape of a heart.

"Enjoy, that cake is filled with all my love for you!" Jerry exclaimed while doing a couple of spins.

"Thank you." Allen smiled broadly and soon spotted Lenalee sitting at one of the tables.

"Hi, Lenalee!" Allen sat next to his friend with all the food in his arms, but he decided to eat the cake first.

"Hi, Allen, ooh, cake!" Lenalee gasped excitedly as she looked at the delicious looking cake that Allen was about to gobble up.

"Do you want some?" Allen asked kindly.

"Chocolate cake is my favorite food!" Lenalee exclaimed and grabbed herself a piece of cake. Then she noticed Allen about to take a bit of the cake but she stole away his fork.

"Oh, Allen, how about I feed you." Lenalee suggested with a smile.

"Eh?" Allen blinked.

"Open wide!" Lenalee giggled and slide the fork filled with sugary frosting into the boy's mouth. Allen smiled widely in delight, the cake tasted so good!

"Here comes another one!" Lenalee squealed and plopped another piece of cake in Allen's mouth.

"I think I can eat myself—"

"_And_ another one!" Lenalee plopped several more pieces into Allen's mouth. Allen heavily gulped down on cake and looked at Lenalee who was smiling at him rather dreamily.

"Are you alright, Lenalee?"

"Of course, Allen." Lenalee took a strand of Allen's hair and intertwined it between her fingers. "You have very nice hair, you should grow it out."

"Oh, um." Allen blushed lightly. "The Science Department did create a hair potion—"

"Use it." Lenalee encouraged as she whispered this soothingly in Allen's ear.

"O—okay." Allen gulped and leaned back a bit to get some space but then he felt a hand clasp onto his shoulder.

"Hey, Allen." Lavi bent over and peered at Allen with a seductive smile. "You have some frosting on your cheek; let me get it off for you."

Allen froze when he felt Lavi's tongue slowly brush off the cake frosting that was smeared on his cheek.

Lenalee gasped and pulled a dazed Allen towards her in a safe embrace. "That's gross, Lavi!"

"I was only being helpful." Lavi wrapped an arm around Allen's shoulder and pulled him back to his direction.

"He could've gotten it off himself." Lenalee exclaimed as she pulled Allen back into her arms.

"No he couldn't."

"Yes he could."

"I need to go to the bathroom!" Allen proclaimed loudly and dashed out of the cafeteria as fast as his legs could carry him.

"Where do you think you're going, Moyashi?"

Allen halted when he saw Kanda leaning against a wall with his arms crossed. For some odd reason his hair was down, probably lost his hair tie or something. Then what's the reason for why he's _shirtless _as well?

"Oh, Kanda." Allen breathed. "Link, Lenalee and Lavi have been acting strange . . . well, Jerry as well but he's always that way."

"Who cares about them?" Kanda walked towards Allen who started to back away but Kanda came up and ruthlessly pinned Allen against the wall. Kanda grabbed Allen's chin and tilted it upward towards him.

"I think you need to stop whining, Moyashi." Kanda muttered under his breath.

"It's Allen." Allen retorted quietly. "Also, what the hell are you doing? And why the hell are you shirtless?"

"It's been getting hot here lately." Kanda answered and Allen's eye twitched uncomfortably, especially since Kanda was so close to his face!

"Y—you didn't answer my first question!" Allen stuttered.

"You talk too much, Moyashi." Kanda whispered the nickname and leaned in to kiss Allen but the white haired exorcist was quick and slapped Kanda across the face.

"I'm being violated!" Allen cried and ran into another room, locking the door and making sure that no one was following him. Allen sighed in relief but when he turned around; a pan whacked him on the head and knocked him out.

~x~x~x~x~x~

When Allen woke up, he found himself strapped to a bed by ropes. He looked over and saw _everyone_ that he knows playing _strip poker. _What scared him the most that even the Noahs were playing as well as the Earl!

"Okay, just to recap." Tyki lit a cigarette and plopped it in his mouth. "Whoever wins gets to have Allen 'cause we can't all have him for himself, right?"

Everyone nodded in unison.

Allen's eyes widened in horror. _I'm going to get raped!_

_**Apparently so. **_

_You stay out of this! _

_**No, I'm rather enjoying this very much.**_

_Sicko! _

_**I prefer Magnificent Bastard thank you very much.**_

_Just leave me alone. . . _

_**Hey, I can get you out of this.**_

_I'll handle this myself! _Allen tried to budge on the ropes but it was no use. Even his Innocence was no match for them; there was probably some kind of anti-Innocence power within him. Allen peered over at everyone and noticed how everyone was doing poorly; therefore everyone was almost naked except for Tyki who only lost his jacket.

_Shit, Tyki's wining! _

_**Oi, Allen, listen to your conscious! **_

_You are not my bloody conscious! _

"Hey, Tyki," Road who was now in her undergarments scooted over to Tyki. "Can I still have a turn on Allen even if you win?"

"Haha, no." Tyki glared. "The rules are that _only one_ person will be able to have Allen 'cause it's ridiculous on how everyone wants him."

"Eh? But I'm the only person who has ever kissed him." Road remarked.

"Yes, but I'm the Noah of _Pleasure_ which means I'll be giving him more _fun_ while you'll just be throwing little fancy tea parties for him."

"Hey, don't underestimate my tea parties, Tyki!" Road exclaimed with a death glare.

"Oh, look." Tyki placed down his cards. "Royal Straight Flush. Hey, Road, by the amount of clothing you have left, it looks like you lost."

Road fumed, slapped the cigarette out of Tyki's mouth and stormed over to plop on the Earl's lap.

"Tyki's being mean!" Road whined.

"Tyki, you're grounded." The Earl bluntly replied.

"Eh?" Tyki's mouth dropped.

"Ha!" Bak threw down his cards. "Now I got a Royal Straight Flush! Komui—" Bak dramatically pointed to Komui. "Throw away that bonnet!"

"Never!" Komui cried and hugged his bonnet but Bak snatched it and tossed it into a dark corner. "I'm not playing anymore! Lenalee, we're going home!" Komui grabbed Lenalee and the two disappeared.

Allen mentally slapped himself. _Why Komui? Just why? Oh and not just him, why the Earl! _

_**Well, the Earl and I did have something. . . **_

_I don't need to know! _

_**Do you want my help or not? 'Cause it looks like your pals are starting to get the hang of it.**_

"I got a Royal Straight Flush as well!" Fou exclaimed. "Suck it, Bak! Gimme your pants!" Fou pratcially ripped Bak's pants off of him.

_Oh, God, everyone is becoming so OOC. . . _Allen mentally slapped himself again.

_**It's 'cause of that cologne you put on this morning.**_

_That uke cologne?_

_**No, the seme cologne, of course the uke cologne, dummy! It hypnotizes everyone whenever they spot a sweet smelling uke like yourself and can't keep their hands off of you. Look, if you let me take over your body, I'll get you out of this mess and tell you how to get hid of the cologne**_

_Fine. . ._

Suddenly Allen's skin color turned to gray and his eyes turned to gold. Neah broke apart the ropes retraining him—apparently they were uke proof. Neah slide away from the crowd and quietly opened a gate to the Ark. But considering that the Ark was so bright and colorful, it brought everyone's attention.

"He's escaping!" Lavi announced, he grabbed all his clothes that he lost—his remaining one was his scarf—and chased after Neah along with everyone else.

"No, Allen! Don't go!" Johnny exclaimed with a waterfall of tears flying out of his eyes.

Everyone scurried into the Ark—even Timcanpy was a part of the mob— and chased after Neah. Luckily Neah was able to get back into Allen's room and lock the door tightly shut.

"Okay, here's the cologne." Neah found it on the nightstand took a hold of it. "Do you want me to throw it away?"

Neah transitioned back to Allen and he smirked evilly at the cologne, bringing out his dark side. "No, I have a better idea."

After Allen took a long, hot shower and got rid of the cologne's scent. He secretly placed the cologne in Kanda's room and sneaked away before the hot tempered exorcist could notice. When Kanda found the cologne, he put it on in curiosity-also not knowing what an uke is- and well, lets just say he wasn't too happy about Lavi being all over him.

* * *

><p>AN: It's 3 in the morning and I'm falling asleep so there's probaly lots of grammatical errors but I wanted to get this done. . .


End file.
